Conversations with a 13 year old

The other day

Grace:  Bronte,  how long are you going to wait to have children?  If you wait too much longer, you'll be so old, you'll be raising teenagers in your 60s.

Bronte:  Mom was 27 when she had me.

Grace:  Yeah, well she had ME when she was 37 and she doesn't like being a Mom of teenagers in her 50s.  She's out of energy.

Another day

Grace:  Mom, is going through menopause like going through old lady puberty?

Yesterday

Grace (in tears):  I'm so stressed out.  I don't have time to do everything I have to do tonight!  I have so much homework and I have to study for a big math test!!

Robyn:  I thought you were done with your homework--you spent a lot of time in the bathroom.  Maybe you need to prioritize and put the homework first.

Grace:  Well, I was taking care of my hygiene.  THAT is VERY important, MOTHER!

A while ago

After a long conversation with Grace about feeling inadequate and not good enough about certain things.

Robyn:  Well, I think that Satan is working hard on you.  (What she meant was "You are a very strong and good person and Satan is trying hard to get you to think otherwise.")

Grace (completely misunderstanding the point):  You think I'm possessed by Satan?  Who says that to their child?

Robyn has to spend the next hour convincing Grace that she DOES NOT, in fact, believe that Grace is possessed by Satan.  Sheesh!